2005-02-12 - 12:07 a.m.

Seventy times seven

(myself) says: G'day
Fh.Ky says: yo
Fh.Ky says: whats up?
(myself) says: not a lot
(myself) says: what are you up to today?
Fh.Ky says: how are you feeling?
Fh.Ky says: i am working
(myself) says: are you (etc)
Fh.Ky says: yeah i am
(myself) says: i had a very bad night last night but now I am ok
Fh.Ky says: well it is good that things are better
(myself) says: I hope I am not interrupting anything
Fh.Ky says: i am working on a kids talk but i am happy to chat for a bit
(myself) says: yeah just if you can pray for me I was very bad last night and then i said some very bad things to my mum and swearing because she tries to keep me up at night and i don't want to say awful things to her but I have to or else she will keep at it and i will be more desperate
Fh.Ky says: why does she try and keep you up?
(myself) says: in order to inflict a maximum of pain on me
Fh.Ky says: cant you just go into your room and close the door?
(myself) says: yes and then she will go into the room next and make sarcastic groans and fake laughs and stamp her feet and say things like "there's no hope for you is there" purposely as loud so i can hear
Fh.Ky says: wow...
Fh.Ky says:
Fh.Ky says: can you get headphones with some relaxing music or something?
Fh.Ky says: like ones that cut out ambient noise?
(myself) says: yes sometimes I listen to the bible on mp3 player
(myself) says: but she will say things to get a reaction to "make sure" I am listening and then if she doesn't get a reaction she will do it louder
Fh.Ky says: well i think if you just did that all the time, with music or bible it would make your mum less likely to do it, because you are ignoring her
Fh.Ky says: but if you just keep ignoring it will break her will, because she is wanting a reaction
(myself) says: that's what I try and always she knows what to do to make a maximum of pain she would come to me and say something like "would you like me to go to bed now or can I go on the computer (the computer is 3m away from my door and keeps me awake)" and if I answer the question honestly she will get angry and start calling me pathetic and slamming the doors and saying things like "your brother is right y
(myself) says: ou just want to control people"
Fh.Ky says:
Fh.Ky says: i will definatly pray for you,
Fh.Ky says: just keep trying to be loving even when your mum doesnt deserve it...
(myself) says: yes I try and the more I try the more she enjoys hurting me
Fh.Ky says: yeah thats is hard
(myself) says: please pray that I can move in to a Christian home
Fh.Ky says: i will do that
(myself) says: thanks

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